the doldrums

the doldrums

In the 18th century, sailors of sail-powered boats, travelling through parts of the Atlantic Ocean and the Pacific Ocean would find themselves trapped in low-pressure areas around the equator where the prevailing winds are insanely calm. After having navigated the seas through variable winds and extreme weather squalls, thunderstorms and hurricanes, the unexpected calm would catch them by surprise, and leave them trapped for periods of days or even weeks.   Welcome to the doldrums.

In modern colloquial terms, we refer to the doldrums as a period of stagnation, or a time when things slump,  or a period of listlessness.   I think, however, that it makes a lot of sense that these doldrums settle in after you’ve completed the ride-of-your-life.  I try to imagine those 18th century sailors, barely surviving a massive hurricane at sea….in those crazy, hand-crafted wooden boats.  It’s a wonder anybody survived crossing the Seas at all!  But having survived such a feat —- heck, everything that came after THAT must have seemed listless.  Hmmmm.  Listless.  Would that be kinda, sorta how it would be like…..if you worked, and fought for, and put it all out there for the run-of-your-life, …..and survived, say…a Marathon?

Yes, yes… I looked it up!  Would I ever let you down??

Listless:  lacking energy or enthusiasm.  

What really surprised me….was how my emotions went from “top of the world”… the doldroms….in only two weeks.  And it’s not an attention thing.  Not at all.  People are still wonderfully interested in the experience.  No, it’s not them…it’s definately M.E.  I’m back to running.  I’m in the middle of a Half Marathon training schedule, preparing myself to run the Rutgers Half Marathon in April.  So, I’ve got something “to do”.  But my heart is just not into it.  And I’m perplexed as to why??

February is a particularly difficult month for me in general.  It’s l.o.v.e.l.y. because my Erin was born in February, and then there is always…..Valentine’s Day.  But overall….February is a cold, Looooong, little month that sits between New Years and Spring.  By February, my heart is calling for daffodils, and pussy-willows, and crocus!  The GroundHog apparently did NOT see his shadow, so “they” say — Spring is coming.  Whoever “they” are.  All I know is, we woke up to snow this morning, Booooo!!  Hey you “they”…..get it straight.  Are we getting Spring or Snow?  Mama don’t like to be messed with in February!  Makes her grumpy!  She’s in the doldrums, in case you haven’t heard.  So, don’t P.L.A.Y!  Get this weather-thing straight and then….We’ll Talk.

Anyway….once I pegged what was going on….I started to feel a little better.  I’ve gotta start figuring out how to make some w.i.n.d. blow around my sail again.  This CALM… too still for me.  Gotta shake it up.

I began today, with something very simple.  I lit a candle, ( aroma-theraphy works Boo!)…and began to clean my closet.  LOL.  Some of you are out there saying, d@mn Diane, that’s torture, NOT wind!  LOL, well — at first, at first.  But it turns out that with every little bit of junk, or useless stuff that I chose to release…..I felt my weight lighten, I felt my sail begin to ruffle, and a little wind began to blow.  Ahhh…my soul was moving again.  I felt a bit more enthusiastic about doing “The Next Thing”.  That’s a start.

So…chill-ax Diane.  You are at the start of starting again.  It’s the uneasy time.  But one thing is truer than true — You MUST stop eating like a Beast!  The Marathon Party is O-VER Girl.  Reign it in.  Reign it in.  You’ve gained 5 pounds in the past two weeks — and even though you won’t admit it as easily as before — you are Judging Yourself for It!


Si, es verdad.


Ciao for now…..Diane


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