New Years Eve 2012 – reflections on the year

New Years Eve 2012 – reflections on the year

I should start by admitting that I bailed on my 22 mile run this morning.  It bummed me out — but that lead me to stop, chill, and assess.  A full 36o degree view of where I am and what I’ve done this year — is needed here.

I didn’t run the 22 miles.  So what.  I tried.  I suited up, got 2.5 miles into it — and then — well…….I just didn’t want to do it.  It was so freaking cold.  I didn’t want to be out there for 5 hours.  So I didn’t.  I say it casually, but when I got home, I stripped off my layers and went straight upstairs, to our bedroom, closed the shades, and climbed back into bed.  That’s where the depressed go, isn’t it?  Into the dark.

My husband brought me coffee.  He tried to cheer me up.  I gave him the look of death…  LOL, yea…you know, the kind husbands can even see in the dark.  THAT one.  He told me to drink the coffee and then come down, then he left.  So basically…..Don’t lie here and wallow Diane.  Crap!  That’s exactly what I wanted to do.  But I listened.  I got up, took my coffee downstairs.  And began to let the light in.  A little.

By the end of the day, as I sit here writing in the late afternoon — the light has emerged inside my soul, and I’m feeling better.  How’d it happen?  Friends.  It’s that simple.  First, I called Marathon Brian.  He said alot to me.  ALOT.  But the one thing that stuck to my heart was this…”Diane, finish this.  Don’t NOT finish this.  No matter what happens that day, see it through.  Everything about this has been positive.  There are no negatives in this experience.  None.  The only one that exists is — if you don’t see it through.  Finish this.”    His words played on my heart all day like harp strings.  As I remembered them, my heart would throb.  No negatives.  None.  Finish this.  I decided today — that THAT was exactly what I would do.  I’m Finishing This.  No matter what.  All that I have done, all of my training, will have to be enough.

Then, I went shopping.  LOL.   Thank  you Dawn.  I know you think I did you a favor allowing myself to be company for you as you shopped for your New Year’s Eve outfit.  But you did me a huge favor getting me out of the house — and giving me laughter.  ps — you are going to look FAB tonight.

Then I ran into Scott at ShopRite and we had lunch together at the famous Caribbean Grille.  The food was great, but the company was better.  Scott always has realistic and humorous insight into my self-inflicted criticism.  He tells me, his personal challenge is to get me to the starting line of the race.  LOL – ie — he will talk me off the ledge as many times as necessary in the next two weeks.  Scott, sir, I thank you!

Finally arrived home again, and Peter is cooking a lovely New Year’s Eve dinner.  We have a bottle of chilled Veuve Clicquot (rose!) in the refrigerator, and plans to make one appetizer for snacking later.  Only one Diane?  Yes — we chose quality over quantity this year.  Pete and I are making roasted rosemary potatoes, and topping them with crème fraîche and a little caviar!   Tiny little bites — but delicious ones!

To keep my mind on the ball – and to complete the 360 view.  Here is a review of 2012.

  • I started the year at 210.6 pounds — ended 198.8  Very cool.
  • I shrunk out of Plus sizes and into Normal clothes.  Good GOD that felt amazing.
  • I ran over 900 miles this year.  325 in training for the Half Marathon in April.  500 miles so far in training for the Marathon.  And the rest , casually between April and September in the off-season.  That’s like running from East Brunswick New Jersey to southern Florida.  Ha!!
  • Um – in case you missed that — I Ran a Half Marathon!!  Diane, Girl, you are bad @ss!
  • My 12 week active link challenge is done and I earned 802 Activity Points in 12 weeks, and met my daily goal 95% of the time.  Very cool.
  • I completed my first Deepak Chopra meditation challenge.  It won’t be my last!
  • I made many new friends, and deepened existing friendships.  Priceless — each and every one.
  • and to my best recollection — I only cried tears of joy this year.  The best kind!

I feel Strong — Because I AM Strong!

Come on in 2013 — we have big plans together, You and I.  But I can’t tell you what’s going to happen —- that would spoil all of the fun.  It’s a Big Delicious Surprise!

Ciao for now…….Diane

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