2 steps forward, 1 step back

2 steps forward, 1 step back

You know this dance, right?  Ugh.  Right

Tonight, I’m digging down deep, deeper, deeper still….to find the strength to accept.   Accept that real change takes time.  I WISH there was a secret book with all the answers.  Answers to the tough questions.  Questions like, why do I lose control, after days of feeling Good?  Why do I continue to fall into compulsive bingeing, after ALL this time of empowered and educated eating?  WHAT am I looking for in the food?  HOW can I fill that void with something else?  WHAT is the something else?

<deep deep breathing…..let the tears come…….and then let them go, Diane>

Tonight, the answers are not here.  Tonight is filled with questions.  But tomorrow will be filled with the energy to continue the search……..maybe tomorrow……maybe tomorrow…….tomorrow….

About Diane

Ciao! My name is Diane. I'm a wife, a mom, a working professional, and a Weight Watcher from New Jersey. I started blogging in 2011, at 45 years old, when I was training for my first Half Marathon at Rutgers on April 22, 2012. Since then, I've lost 80 pounds, completed my Half Marathon goal and gone on to train for and run my very first Full Marathon. On Jan 13, 2013, I ran the Disney Marathon in Orlando, Fl! What an incredible day. As the saying goes -- "The person who starts the race is not the same person who finishes the race." I am forever changed! So now we move on to the next phase of this journey! Come along. We're in this together!! Ciao for now!

2 Responses »

  1. Diane, I’m not here to offer you an answer, rather, I think it’s ok to acknowledge that we all have our inner demons & it’s ok to co-exist with them.

    Like you, I have my binge eatings occasionally. Last Sunday, I went to do some grocery shopping at Whole Foods @ 9:30pm. I was starving, so I ate 2 freshly baked cookies in the parking lot. While I’m not too proud of it, but I think it’s ok to let it go occasionally.

    I believe that it’s very important to reward yourself for good behavior. If I eat 4/5 servings of fruits & veggies during the weekday, I’m ok to give myself a break on weekend.

    It’s also imperative not to surround yourself with temptations. I have a sweet tooth and am partial to French pastries. Fortunately in order to get anything worth my while, I have to drive out of my way.

    The way I see it, if you stretch the rubber band too much, it’ll snap. Try not to let it get to that critical point.

    You just need to find the balance. It’s difficult, but you can do it.

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