By the time I had found the Couch to 5K running plan, I had already spent quite a bit of time “thinking”. Thinking about how hard it might be to run. Thinking of every excuse why I shouldn’t do it. Thinking about my creaky knees. Thinking about how my feet hurt. Thinking…thinking…..well, I’m here to tell you that as good as thinking is……thinking doesn’t make the scale move. So I sat on my couch with my laptop and did a google search for “learn to run a 5k” — and there it was — C25K.com. I was amazed right off the bat by how I had to choose the langauge for the training plan. There were 28 other language choices besides English. Ok, so I’ve traveled the world, I’m not mono-linguistic But how impressed I was when I realized that there were people all around the world who had an “I wonder if I could learn to run?” moment JUST LIKE I HAD. That was somehow comforting to me there on my couch in New Jersey. I was setting out on a path that many others had taken, and I didn’t feel so alone anymore. It’s also cool how my thoughts quickly moved from “I’m not alone” to realizing….”hey, there’s a community of wanna-be runners out there, and I want IN”. Kind of funny for someone who has been on the couch for so long, right? When change happens, sometimes it happens FAST. I think it harkens back to “waking up”. I fought and delayed waking up juuust about a long as I possibly could. But once I was awake, I wanted to go go go, so my weight could go go go away. (LOL, been there too?) Yeah, most of us have.
I had moved along the learning curve from DOUBT — to –> WONDER, and here I was ready to take the Leap of Faith into TRYING. TRYING requires some work to set yourself up for success. So I had to work on my brain some more, and work to change that “desire to get started” into “a committment to stick with it” THEY ARE DIFFERENT THINGS! I have to remind myself of that all the time. So, I had to deal with something first. I knew myself well enough that I KNEW I needed a promise….a promise FROM myself TO myself of one little HUGE thing. [Right hand on heart, — Repeat Out Lout Diane — “no matter how hard this is, YOU WILL NOT QUIT. ” Now here came the hard part — Now promise yourself that you mean what you just said.
I printed the running plan, and made a schedule for myself. I worked out which 3 days would be my running days, Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday. I then added “running” into my Outlook Calendar typically early in the morning before work and blocked out the time — Yeah, I treated these appointments with myself with as much importance and respect as I would an appointment with anyone else. Not to be broken, or forgotten!
Peter took me to Dicks Sporting Goods and I bought new Asics sneakers. These were my running shoes — only to be worn when I was running. This sounds silly, I know, but I will tell you that to this day, when I see those sneakers, I feel strong, I feel different than I do when I wear any others shoes or sneakers. Those sneakers are part of the New Me. They are special, and they are a marker in my life that I’m on a path…..a path to a place where I respect myself, where I say positive things about myself, where I value myself. Who knew an ordinary pair of sneakers could take on so much power, one mile at a time.
So all these baby steps played a role in setting me up to begin TRYING. TRYING to be different today than I was yesterday.
Ciao for now … Diane
I understand how important the running shoes are as compared to all other shoes in your possession. I have a pair of the Vibram “finger” shoes I wear to the gym. It started out as a lark. I saw someone else wearing them and decided I had to own a pair. Well, I now equate these “finger” shoes with vigor, energy, drive and power … all the all the attributes upon which I call whenever I reinvent myself at the gym. I wear these shoes when I “train.” Whenever I’m wearing these shoes I’m training. When I slip the shoes onto my foot, one toe at a time, finishing with my heel spilling in last, I feel the metamorphosis from Clark Kent to …
I get it.