the 9 miles I didn’t run

the 9 miles I didn’t run

It’s Sunday.  And I spent it thinking about the 9 miles I didn’t run today.


9 miles is what the schedule asked fo today — and I just wasn’t ready.  I’ve been missing runs and I knew I couldn’t do 9. I went to bed last night with intentions to get up.  Or so I said.  I asked Peter to set the alarm for 6am.  I woke and took my gel.  45 mins later, I was supposed to get up and go.  But I didn’t.  The worry of 9 miles kept me in bed.

I spent the day doing a million errands.  I was active and busy and ate pretty well.  But the 9 miles I didn’t run…..well….I carried them like an albatross around my neck.  Even now, as the night wears down….and I prepare for bed…..I’m bargaining with myself that maybe I can run 5 miles tomorrow to make up for what I didn’t do today.

My Inner Voice screams, “S.T.O.P. Diane!”  Just let it go.  Let the 9 miles go.  It’s sooo not about the miles, 9, or otherwise.  Just remember last time you ran this Half Marathon schedule.  You weren’t READY to run 9 miles then either.  LMAO…w.h.o. is e.v.e.r.  ready to run 9 miles anyway??  But the difference between last time and this time is this.  Last time……you weren;t scared.  You got up, and went out the door with fierce tenacity.  You went.  And did it.

Suuuuureee….it wasn’t perfect.  You didn’t run every step.  It was a struggle.  A fight.  But you went out there, and fought the fight!  And came home like a sweaty, ridiculous, happy mess!

Those memories of who I was back then, and how I chose to face my challeneges….really made an impact on me today.   So, I’m heading to bed tonight, Sunday night, with a plan.  No….I’m not running 5 miles.  I’m not going to try to make up for the 9 miles I didn’t run.  They are gone.  Unimportant.  What matters……ALL that maters….are the miles left in front of me in training….AND..what I choose to do with them.

Tomorrow is two miles.  So.  I’m going to run 2 solid, strong miles.  Run.  No messing around.  I’m going to retrace my steps.  Fight to find “the switch” again…..and get back on track.  And pick up from here.  I have 13 days before I have to fight 9 miles again.  That’s a lot of good solid time….if I dedicate myself to them.

2 miles tomorrow.  Make yourself proud running them, Diane.

2 solid, proud miles tomorrow  are > 9 miles that never mattered!

Ciao for now….Diane


About Diane

Ciao! My name is Diane. I'm a wife, a mom, a working professional, and a Weight Watcher from New Jersey. I started blogging in 2011, at 45 years old, when I was training for my first Half Marathon at Rutgers on April 22, 2012. Since then, I've lost 80 pounds, completed my Half Marathon goal and gone on to train for and run my very first Full Marathon. On Jan 13, 2013, I ran the Disney Marathon in Orlando, Fl! What an incredible day. As the saying goes -- "The person who starts the race is not the same person who finishes the race." I am forever changed! So now we move on to the next phase of this journey! Come along. We're in this together!! Ciao for now!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *