Impelled

Impelled

As I was running, and walking during this past summer, I was really hitting my stride.  I was stronger, breathing well, even picking up speed.  Committed was a word I contemplated using about myself.  Yea, I was committed.  Until it rained, or work required me to travel, or my girls had an event I needed to attend.  You know how it can be.  Life needed living.  And somehow it all came ahead of my running.  It was then I had to admit that I was committed to trying, but it wasn’t a priority.   When I googled the definition of committment, I came across words like dedicated application and the state of being emotionally or physically impelled.  Impelled?  I had to look that one up.  And when I did I found this; impelled:  to urge or drive forward as if by exertion of strong moral pressure.  Ooooh, I like the sound of that one in my ear, and in my brain.  I like those words associated with my name.   How could I make that happen???  I wonder….hmmm, good things happen when I wonder!  I was running pretty regularly by this time, but that didn’t mean I was committed.  Nope, unfortunately not.

So I started thinking about other times when I had made a committment and succeeded, or maybe when I failed.   Anyone who is married would likely think of the committment they made at the altar with their spouse.  I thought about my committment to Peter, and how easy it feels some days, and how not-so-easy other days.  I reminded myself that committment required making your marriage a priority.  It required flexibility and the art of negotiation — trying to find win/win situations whenever possible.  It reminded me that sometimes you have to do things that are not your favorite, but because it made the one you loved happy , and that the benefits would come back to you later , maybe not for a while, but they would come.

I then started thinking about the committment I made to myself when I joined Weight Watchers, and how it required me to open myself up to change.  To have faith, to follow a schedule, to be accountable.   It also reminded me that the path to success required committment, and that it was important to recognize right from the start that this path was NOT a straight line.  This path would be a wandering journey through places, both familiar and unknown, and would take me to unexpected places, sometimes doubling back.  But if you stay on the path — you will find your way to your destination AND will have arrived having seen amazing places and having learned many things along the way.

So, I came back to my committment to running, and pieced all these things together to figure out how I could become Impelled to Run.   I created a schedule for running, but I was flexible about it.  I needed to run 3 days a week, and the days/times would move around with my schedule, BUT the week would not end without 3 runs — rain or shine.   In August 2011, I was just finishing up my Couch-to-5K program OUTSIDE.  I was now an official runner outside.  The summer blew by and I had spent most Saturdays listening to my friend Lisa talk about running this 5K or that 5K.  I made the mistake (LOL, or great fortune) of saying to Lisa — “I’d love to do that someday”.  Well, Lisa is a force to be reckoned with.  She’s lost 100 pounds on Weight Watchers and is still at it.   She challenged me in ways I had not expected, but in a way that I was totally ready for.  She said, do a 5K with me!

I went home, and slowly came to realize that she had put a bug in my brain that would not go away.  I went to my old friend Google, and found the East Brunswick Road Races 5K.  A 5K race in my Own Home Town in October 2011.  It only took me about two days to push myself to sign up.  I wasn’t concerned with speed, or pace or timing.  I wanted to see if I could do it.  That’s all I wanted to know.  Who are you Diane and what are you capable of?

I was impelled to find out.

Ciao for now…..Diane

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