As I was running, and walking during this past summer, I was really hitting my stride. I was stronger, breathing well, even picking up speed. Committed was a word I contemplated using about myself. Yea, I was committed. Until it rained, or work required me to travel, or my girls had an event I needed to attend. You know how it can be. Life needed living. And somehow it all came ahead of my running. It was then I had to admit that I was committed to trying, but it wasn’t a priority. When I googled the definition of committment, I came across words like dedicated application and the state of being emotionally or physically impelled. Impelled? I had to look that one up. And when I did I found this; impelled: to urge or drive forward as if by exertion of strong moral pressure. Ooooh, I like the sound of that one in my ear, and in my brain. I like those words associated with my name. How could I make that happen??? I wonder….hmmm, good things happen when I wonder! I was running pretty regularly by this time, but that didn’t mean I was committed. Nope, unfortunately not.
So I started thinking about other times when I had made a committment and succeeded, or maybe when I failed. Anyone who is married would likely think of the committment they made at the altar with their spouse. I thought about my committment to Peter, and how easy it feels some days, and how not-so-easy other days. I reminded myself that committment required making your marriage a priority. It required flexibility and the art of negotiation — trying to find win/win situations whenever possible. It reminded me that sometimes you have to do things that are not your favorite, but because it made the one you loved happy , and that the benefits would come back to you later , maybe not for a while, but they would come.
I then started thinking about the committment I made to myself when I joined Weight Watchers, and how it required me to open myself up to change. To have faith, to follow a schedule, to be accountable. It also reminded me that the path to success required committment, and that it was important to recognize right from the start that this path was NOT a straight line. This path would be a wandering journey through places, both familiar and unknown, and would take me to unexpected places, sometimes doubling back. But if you stay on the path — you will find your way to your destination AND will have arrived having seen amazing places and having learned many things along the way.
So, I came back to my committment to running, and pieced all these things together to figure out how I could become Impelled to Run. I created a schedule for running, but I was flexible about it. I needed to run 3 days a week, and the days/times would move around with my schedule, BUT the week would not end without 3 runs — rain or shine. In August 2011, I was just finishing up my Couch-to-5K program OUTSIDE. I was now an official runner outside. The summer blew by and I had spent most Saturdays listening to my friend Lisa talk about running this 5K or that 5K. I made the mistake (LOL, or great fortune) of saying to Lisa — “I’d love to do that someday”. Well, Lisa is a force to be reckoned with. She’s lost 100 pounds on Weight Watchers and is still at it. She challenged me in ways I had not expected, but in a way that I was totally ready for. She said, do a 5K with me!
I went home, and slowly came to realize that she had put a bug in my brain that would not go away. I went to my old friend Google, and found the East Brunswick Road Races 5K. A 5K race in my Own Home Town in October 2011. It only took me about two days to push myself to sign up. I wasn’t concerned with speed, or pace or timing. I wanted to see if I could do it. That’s all I wanted to know. Who are you Diane and what are you capable of?
I was impelled to find out.
Ciao for now…..Diane