“Now, where’d I put those boot straps, anyway? Cuz I need to pull myself back up – Big Time! ”
<Standing back — looking at that sentence, and judging>.
Girl. tsk tsk tsk. Are you that pathetic? I didn’t think so. Now, get up. Go run 3 miles and I’m saying I want you to kick your own @ss doing it!! Then I’ll see you back here in about 34 minutes, and you’d BETTER have your F.I.E.R.C.E. back on by then!
GULP, yes ma’am.
And sure enough — 3 miles later — my belly aching and whining was gone. I chose not to do the 13 miles I missed yesterday. Rather, just stay on schedule and keep moving ahead toward the miles ahead of me. But I was feeling down about it. Hell, I don;t need much to bring me down. It’s an old habit I haven’t quite kicked yet. But I fight it off all the time. Turns out – All I needed today was a good old-fashioned butt-kickin’ run. To teach myself that I am fierce. Yea, I am forgetful. I forget that I’m fierce. Ok, Ok, we’ll look it up — just for old time’s sake. Dictionary!! por favor!
Fierce: Showing a heartfelt and powerful intensity.
Ahh, yes. L.O.V.E. That. F.I.E.R.C.E. It even sounds, well..fierce. The way it rolls off your lips. It sounds fast. Like it’s gone, down the street before you even get the whole word out of your mouth.
Being Fierce…..involves alot of things. It’s about Feeling Fierce, Looking Fierce, Wanting Fierce, Tasting Fierce, Craving Fierce —and yet it’s all about Belief. Fierce….is born, and dies…in your head. Yeah. Your muscles don’t make you Fierce. Nope. Your sweat don’t make your fierce. Nope. Not your shoes, or your clothes. Nope. It’s your head, and in your heart. Your head and your heart make you Fierce.
Yo, Diane. I found those boot straps, still need them? Nah. Not really. I’m standing up, on my own. I’m physically moving through the motions…but I’ve lost some of my heart. And what I’ve learned about myself through this Marathon experience is — I CANNOT run this thing with just my body. I NEED my head and my heart MORE than my body to do this.
So, I’ve had to clean house, a.g.a.i.n.
Out with all you whiney thoughts. Be gone, you belly aching complaints. Away with those whoa-is-me ideas that lead me to eat for no reason. Like magnets with two N poles — I repel you. GET AWAY FROM ME!
I’m mentally putting my F.I.E.R.C.E. back on. Kinda like how a woman squeezes into her Spanx in the morning, I’m stuffing my size 16 into my F.i.e.r.c.e. and I’m already feeling more Kick @ss than I did this morning.
I need this.
It’s Monday.
I’ve got 3 (6 miler) run days coming up this week, AND a 20 miler on Sunday. I need to Eat, Drink, Sleep, Breathe, and BE Fierce this week.
Heart and Soul — On!
Body – On, altho the light is a little on the dim side. Good sleep and better food is on the agenda for the week.
Head – mmm, On, but not engaged. Not running on full positive power. Back to Meditation this week. I need it. It feeds my Fierce. It feeds my Belief. It exercises my ghosts.
The Vision for the week ahead is set. Done. Feel it girl? Yea. I feel it! I feel the change already. She’s baaaack! God I love that F.I.E.R.C.E. Girl!
Ciao for now….Diane