I had a need…for speed

I had a need…for speed

This morning I wanted speed.  I wanted to go faster.  Faster than usual.  Faster than “the switch”.    So I didn’t listen to my body.  I did my first mile, the first of five, like I had something to prove to somebody.  And then at mile 1.48 — what I got from the whole experiment ……was walking.  Blown. (Not really, but I’ll explain).    So foolish.  Yo, Diane…..your body controls “the switch”, NOT your brain, remember??   Always listen to your body.  When it comes to this running stuff, your brain doesn’t know a thing!

I don’t run fast.  Who cares.  But I am a runner.  Maybe in the old days, I would be a jogger.  But no body says that anymore, do they?  There’s this saying that the difference between jogging and running, is an entry form.  It’s the racing.  Runners compete.  Usually with themselves.  For improvement.  Yes, yes, usually for speed.  There it is — the slippery slope.  No matter who you are –a super fast-y or a new baby gazelle like me — the drive to go faster, Faster, FASTer, FASTER — sneaks into your soul.  This morning, I let my brain get the best of me.  All those thoughts about “Improving my Marathon Finish Time” took over and got the best of me.

Psssst….Diane.  You don’t have a Marathon Finish Time!  Not Yet.

Um.  Er.  Right.

But.  but.  but I wanted to improve.  I want to get better. I want to get….ffffaaaassstttteeeerrrr!

Yeah, I know.  It’s a nobel goal.  But remember…..there is plenty of time for improvement.  Plenty.  However — there should be no foolish goal-setting that risks our ultimate end game.  This is your FIRST MARATHON!  #1.  The Beginning.  Numero Uno.

Your goal is Finishing.  That IS the goal.  It has nothing to do with time.  Or Speed.  Or Pace.  Not a darn thing.  Finishing in 6 hours versus 5 1/2 is not going to be any less respectable.  Time has no place in this grand experiment.  Not yet.

Ohhh, I get it.  I GET IT.  Q:  Why are we all wearing time chips if time has nothing to do with it.

A:  Because we are Runners.  It’s what we do.  We compete.  Usually with ourselves.  Our greatest competitor!  The YOU you are, versus the YOU you want to become.  It’s an age-old battle.

There will be plenty of time to improve.  To become better.  To continue transforming.  To grow from a baby gazelle….to a junior gazelle.    Just make this deal with yourself, for now.  For now.  Don’t worry about improving your finish time…..Until you actually HAVE a Finish Time.    LOL.  Sounds logical — but it’s the constant mental battle that comes with running, or any other timed sport, for that matter.

F.I.N.I.S.H.I.N.G.

It is a FINE GOAL.

Right now, Diane, you are a Starter.  It’s something to be proud of.  You are working every day to continue.  To remain a Starter.  It would be sooooo easy just not to get up tomorrow morning.  Just to skip that run.  And maybe the next one.  Or the one after that.  And before you know it.  Weeks have gone by.  And without meaning it, without intention…..you’ve quit.  It’s THAT easy for it to just h.a.p.p.e.n.

Focus on being a Starter.  Keep strong with it.  Stay tied to it.  Focus on moving along in your evolution to becoming a F.I.N.I.S.H.E.R.

Remember…..those T Shirts they sell at the expo….they read…. “I DID IT!”  Not, “I Did It in X hours.”

Time, speed, pace…have a place —- just not here.  Not now.

Be Patient.

Ciao for now…….Diane

p.s. — I walked for .18 miles — which is nothing.  After that, I started up again — listened to my body — found the switch, and banged out the rest of the 5 miles. I felt great.  Very “gazelle-worthy“.  🙂

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